9.27.2004
Random thought...
Take a look at Faerun. Look at the major battles and struggles throughout history. Then step back and ponder a multidude of planes of existance. Those big struggles were important to those in it but on the grand scale they are a small part of the universe. How small of a struggle are ones own petty concerns.
Take a look at Faerun. Look at the major battles and struggles throughout history. Then step back and ponder a multidude of planes of existance. Those big struggles were important to those in it but on the grand scale they are a small part of the universe. How small of a struggle are ones own petty concerns.
9.21.2004
It is days like today that I used to enjoy. The group getting together and planning to pull down a evil person. To bring them to justice or stop their reign of terror. Those times when I know I am on the side of good getting ready to rid the world of another bit of evil. To comfort myself with the thought that I have helped prevent more families from being ripped apart. To prevent another child from growing up without their parents. Because often the most evil thing a good man can do is nothing at all. Too many years I wandered and sat back watching doing nothing except wander. Now I am with a group of people seeking the cause of good. We are out doing something making a change helping people. It is days like today that make me wonder. We are on another plane of existence. Er.. We are on another world entirely. With its own planes and Gods. Magic here works about the same as it did on my world and the people are close to the same. Here families are torn apart the same way as they are on my world. Here evil does exist and there are hero’s who seek to vanquish them. The many difference between the world are small compared to the similarities. Here a evil lich fled to from our world after we destroyed him. He reformed and we had good information he was a respected man here. A protector of a small town. Hero to the people another who was doing the same thing as I. Preventing families from being destroyed and fighting against evil. Was all that he done here an act. I do not know. I dare not trust any word that he said. I should push this all away from my mind and think about our next mission. I should not let it get to me but still I wonder. If I kill an innocent man either by anger or mistake or some other reason do all my good deeds counter it and I am allowed to still live my life or does that one act negate everything I have done. What about two acts. When does the scale tip when do I switch from being the hunter of evil to the evil hunted? This lich committed a great many crimes on our world. He also though is praised as a hero for many years on this one. Did we have a right to judge? I wish I had the blind faith that Deidus has. Eilistrea’s teachings say to repay violence with swifter violence. As I adventure more and more I am wondering if this is the path for me. I do not wish to be the judge, jury, and executioner. I do not know if I can turn my back to future times. I think the next time it comes up I will have to speak with Deidus about it. To be sure of the personal moral character before we attack with lethal force. Though I could always pursue a non-lethal route. Perhaps the fact that I still question my actions is what separates me from those we hunt. I should worry the day I stop pondering this.
Oh to be like Sam and so carefree. No worries except there to get the next bit of pipe weed. Though I have pondered her motivations in the past I think I have finally figured it out. I know Deidus keeps her around because she appears to be skilled at scouting. Also I ponder if she is a way to keep Cervantes a bit under control. I don’t think Deidus would do such a thing but I could understand such. I think her motivation is she heard stories about hero’s and wanted to be part of those stories. Which is understandable. Perhaps when she was younger she heard a bard tell a tale of glory and helping others and she took it to heart. Such is the feed of a bardic life. To hope your songs and words would effect someone into doing the right thing. She has helped that I am sure. Though I did not personally see those moments I think I shall let her know I understand and that I shall write a song for her. It will be the Ode to Sam.. A story about someone who looks up to hero’s and wanted to be like them but never quite got to be the one she wanted to be. Then she finds out there are others looking up to her and that she is a hero to so many and she never realized it. I think it shall be a grand tale and hopefully when she is traveling around inspiring others to do good people will hear my song and they will also be inspired.
Killing the lich I do not doubt was the right thing to do. I just worry that others will suffer because he is no longer there performing the good deeds that he did do. Even if he did a little good it means his soul was redeemable. I hope that whatever god he went to will weigh that in his suffering. Give him a moments respite for the innocents he saved. Though if he did it for no other purpose than to further his own deeds or if he did it to throw off those who could detect his true nature or if he setup the acts and then his own heroic fight then I hope he burns in the hottest fires and suffers for longer than the world still exists.
Oh to be like Sam and so carefree. No worries except there to get the next bit of pipe weed. Though I have pondered her motivations in the past I think I have finally figured it out. I know Deidus keeps her around because she appears to be skilled at scouting. Also I ponder if she is a way to keep Cervantes a bit under control. I don’t think Deidus would do such a thing but I could understand such. I think her motivation is she heard stories about hero’s and wanted to be part of those stories. Which is understandable. Perhaps when she was younger she heard a bard tell a tale of glory and helping others and she took it to heart. Such is the feed of a bardic life. To hope your songs and words would effect someone into doing the right thing. She has helped that I am sure. Though I did not personally see those moments I think I shall let her know I understand and that I shall write a song for her. It will be the Ode to Sam.. A story about someone who looks up to hero’s and wanted to be like them but never quite got to be the one she wanted to be. Then she finds out there are others looking up to her and that she is a hero to so many and she never realized it. I think it shall be a grand tale and hopefully when she is traveling around inspiring others to do good people will hear my song and they will also be inspired.
Killing the lich I do not doubt was the right thing to do. I just worry that others will suffer because he is no longer there performing the good deeds that he did do. Even if he did a little good it means his soul was redeemable. I hope that whatever god he went to will weigh that in his suffering. Give him a moments respite for the innocents he saved. Though if he did it for no other purpose than to further his own deeds or if he did it to throw off those who could detect his true nature or if he setup the acts and then his own heroic fight then I hope he burns in the hottest fires and suffers for longer than the world still exists.
